I've found a great doctor and a great hospital, which have been reported the most supportive of natural birth in the area. So you can imagine how my anxiety levels went through the roof when reading this blog post from a woman who recently gave birth not only from the hospital I'm going to give birth at, but had the same OB as me. She reports on a traumatic birthing experience with the OB who was present. In summary, she did not only NOT give informed consent, she had no opportunities to give consent at all to some of the interventions!
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| "Hey guysh! WTF ru doing? Guysh??" |
Let me say something radical here: no, not always.
I have a difficult time trusting doctors. I always have, and probably always will. That's probably why I've done so much research on all the interventions they implement during labor and delivery. And while I don't have "street cred," I hope that more women will take the initiative to educate themselves before they head out for that momentous hospital trip.
So, let me say for the record, I'm not anti-doctor. If I was, I wouldn't be giving birth at a hospital. I know why they're there: in case of an emergency. But birth in itself is NOT an emergency, it's a natural process that is simple, beautiful, and should be treated this way.
I know people get very emotional and opinionated about birth and their own birthing experiences, and I guess I'm no different. I know everyone's experience is different. What I'm saying here though is, please educate yourself about birth before going to the hospital. Prepare yourself so you don't have to ask questions at the eleventh hour. That way, we can truly have Informed Consent and have the birth birthing experiences possible.
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| Look at the bliss on her face! |
Please ask me questions if you have any. I know I'm posting something that could get some people's feathers ruffled, but that's not my intent. Hopefully this will get some people thinking about these important issues.
I agree with your belief that people should educate themselves prior to their birth. So many women go to the hospital totally relying on the opinions of their doctors when making major decisions.
ReplyDeleteThat said, please try to stay open minded as well. I truly think that my delivery with Collin was seriously complicated because my doctor allowed me to attempt a vaginal birth for far too long. I understand that every circumstance is different but I dug my heels in about not having a Csection for as long as she would let me. In the end, because it ended in an emergency delivery, Collin was nearly life-flighted to another hospital, I was knocked out, and I didn't get to hold him or see him for about 6 hours. In the end I regret many of the choices I made. Choices which I made because I felt I was properly educated on the risks of interventions and their overuse.
Every birth is different and its good to be informed. However, there is a time when intervention IS necessary so it is important not to let your frustrations with the system and what is happening with other women cloud that fact in the delivery room. I unfortunately learned that the hard way and literally had to grieve over the loss of "my birth plan" for months.
Despite the fact that I am a natural parent, make my own baby food, cloth diaper and breastfeed, I will be having a planned C-Section this time around. The risks are far to great for me. In the end, having a healthy baby and your own health are the most important things. :)
Victoria is open minded. She knows that anything can happen and doesn't judge any individual for the experiences they have or the choices they make. As with so many instances where doctors are involved, too many people lay down and take "their medicine." I know at the moment Vic is feeling very passionate about the process and wants to share her opinions.
ReplyDeleteI feel exactly as you do Andi about waiting for early childhood interventions for Eli. I wanted to let my child develop on his own and not be pushed around by "experts." After all was said and done maybe I should have been more open to intervention earlier, but we all do the best we can with the information we have at any given time in our lives. In the long run I have been a fabulous mother for Eli just as you have been a fabulous mother for Collin. What you can take pride in, is having made informed decisions and having taken the responsibility for his well-being on yourself. Do we always make the right decisions? No, but doctors don't either (in fact, doctors have at times made some very bad decisions). I want to be the ultimate decision maker when it comes to the well-being of my children, even if I'm not 100% correct all the time.
I agree that being informed is one of the most important things someone can do before they deliver. So many people do just go in and take everything as something which HAS to be done, when it is not. One of the most important things, in my opinion, is to make sure that the people who will be there supporting you through the birth are aware of your plans, watching what's going on, and able to step in if need be to say "no." Once you're in the nitty gritty part of labor, you may not have all your wits about you to say something. I mean honestly, you're pushing a person out, that's hard work with or without meds, and takes a lot of focus and energy. Also, talk. Talk talk talk to your doctor and the nurses who are at the hospital until you are blue in the face. Make sure they know how you feel about certain things, and make sure you have an advocate (which you should have in your doula). She might be a little busy with you too though, which is why having hubby know is a good idea too.
ReplyDeleteOne of the things that we didn't get to do, which we had planned on and forgotten (at least I had) in the heat of things, was doing the skin to skin contact as soon as the baby was born. It was something we felt was important. The doctor and nurses were so busy stitching up my tear though that I don't think it occurred to them either. It was also something Luke didn't realize or vocalize till later and we were all alone. Everything turned out fine though, and we still bonded even though it wasn't the instantaneous love at first sight so many people talk about, but I definitely loved her and was all about loving on my baby.
So just remember to instigate conversations. And as for the blog above, I personally wouldn't hold the OB accountable for who the on-call doctor was, unless he was specifically chosen by the main OB for that patient (I wasn't entirely clear on that part of the blog). If the doctor knew how the patient felt, you'd think she wouldn't have left her in his care, and in my experience the doctor doesn't tend to initiate those conversations. Plus, I'm sure when you get to the hospital you can request that, if your doctor cannot be there, that they DO NOT send that doctor. It never hurts at any rate. Try not to sweat it too much and enjoy it as much as you can. Also just remember, God tends to send women pregnancy and delivery amnesia after a while so that you want to do the whole thing over again. I mean, I still remember what happened, it just doesn't seem like such a big deal anymore. I know if you asked me even 6 months after Eden was born, I would have told you that no way was I going through that again for a very long time. Now I'm all "I don't remember it being like this last time." To which Luke just laughs.
It's always good to be as informed as possible about your doctor. Knowing this about his history will either empower you to ensure nothing like that happens to you, or give you the info needed to make an informed decision to find another doctor or midwife. (It's not too late to do that if you decide you don't trust him.)
ReplyDeleteI'm assuming you have a written birth plan which he has signed off on and that should help, but if he's prone to this, it might not be enough. Praying for wisdom and peace for you!!